Smart Ain't the Problem

My children always made great grades, were on the honor roll, and in The Nation Honor Society.  They are smart!  Some worked harder than others in some subjects and some just breezed through those subjects.  Even in college, when application is being put forth, they are amazingly brilliant. Trouble is: smart ain't the problem. The problem is they have little to no common sense.  

It cannot be genetic, my husband and 

I are loaded down with common sense if I do say so myself.  

 

Case in point: my son who is a classical pianist and composer.  

His sophomore year of college, he had moved out and was living with friends in a questionable house near the university.  I went inside the place twice, once before they moved in and once after. Questionable. Dirty. Stinky. Sticky.  They once had a pet goat if that tells you anything.  They are into cross-fit and MMA fights and all things extreme.  So, one evening after watching a fight they decide to go and box one another.  Not one on one mind you, but an all out free for all.  King of the hill if you will.  Clint was on call that weekend and I turned the ringer off on my phone.  As he has done before, God woke me up. I can't explain how he does it, he just does.  

I can be in some deep sleep and set straight up in the bed and something is always wrong or someone always needs me.  I sat up, picked up my phone, went into the bathroom and I had 14 missed calls from my child.  I texted him and he said he was in the living room.  I wasn't quiet, I got in there like momma bear fast!  There he sat...... right hand raised above his head.  Purple fingers peeking out of a homemade cast.  He was in PAIN!  These brilliant young men had made him a cast with a stick, paper towels and duct tape. I KID YOU NOT.  I got scissors and we got the unsatisfactory contraption off of him.  Immediately, the blood flow came back to his fingers and he had some relief.  He sighed, I was mad at his obvious stupidity, and told him to spend the night and we would check it out the following day.   

He felt better the next day although there was some swelling.  Plus, he is 19 and I thought he could read what his body was telling him.  He shook it off, I went about my day and two weeks later he was still feeling a little pain.  I gave him the doctor's number, the credit card, the insurance card, and the card for a prescription if needed. He tried to call the doctor but "something happened". A few days later, my cards are on the island, and he says "all is well!"  I take that to mean:  he saw the doctor, x-rays were ok, and he is just an idiot.  Turns out only 1/3 of my assumptions were correct.... 

Four months later he is begging to see the doctor because he is having trouble playing piano. Wait!  What? I seriously do not understand. Then I get the rundown on how he never went.  I tried to force him to be an adult; and he failed.  Time to put the mommy hat on and take care of business.  I called our friend who is a wonderful hand surgeon and he got Jacob right in; did x-rays and then surgery. Yes, I said surgery.  Fractures, bone grafts, and pins OH MY!  Are kids not born with common sense?  Are today's millennials just incapable of it? I am at a loss.  Needless to say, he did learn several lessons. 1) Do what your momma says when she says to do it 2) I am a musician not a fighter 3) Be more careful with my hands or piano may not be in my future.

What he had was literally called a "boxer's fracture".  What in the world?  It makes me wonder: have I done enough to prepare these kids for life?  Have I been too available? Our children grew up with two parents who loved The Lord and one another.  That's good right?

So, as I prayerfully write this, the only place I feel I could have averted this situation was to teach him the proper hand placement and stance for boxing an entire group of unsupervised boys in the middle of the night. Man!  I can't do anything right!  HA!  

Don't let things get you down mommies, I am learning that common sense will come.  It just takes a few big life lessons to get them there because "smart ain't the problem".  I Thes 5:11 says "Encourage one another and build one another up".  Lord knows the kids won't do it for us so find some good girlfriends and fellow moms and stick close.  You need a tribe!  And listen to The Lord when he tells you something is wrong...